Increasing Your Visibility At Work Without Sacrificing Your Family Life

Often, as working parents, our focus is exclusively on completing the to-do list in the most efficient way, that our default is to sit down at the desk and work like a Trojan, without stopping or even daring to accept a lunch invitation because you have an absolute deadline – child care pick up at 17:30. It’s not a deadline that can be moved by even an hour or too, not one to be negotiated – you have to meet it.

Our work sees us supporting working parents of young children, often in their thirties and early forties, that the timing is not right to even consider leadership roles or promotion – the common line we hear is “the children are too young and I cannot give the time the organisation needs”.

Such assumptions can be challenged if your organisation is an advocate for having strong leaders who also ‘walk the talk’, effectively making time work and their personal life.

This belief that it’s not possible to have both, often leads to working parents becoming invisible – they come in, do the job, get their head down and then leave. If they look up, or pop into the office restaurant they may notice their peers having lunch with senior directors, before rushing back to tick off the next ‘to-do’ item on the list.

This strategy may feel like it’s working, after all you’re less likely to be included in additional projects which means less additional volume of work, so the deadline is still reachable. But, what is the cost of making yourself invisible?

You become excluded from the circles where decisions are made that impact career choices and developmental possibilities. You lose the opportunity to maximise your potential.  Even if you are making a choice to not leap into a leadership role in the next 12 months, it is important to continue to build the relationships necessary to gain visibility and access to key stakeholders. It is this network of people who will think of you and speak for you, in your absence, when they are part of teams influencing change and future choices for the business.

What do you need to know before you start:

• Have clear career goals or at least an understanding of your professional aspirations and the impact you want to have. Review these goals every 6 months as they are likely to change as the children grow.
• Reflect on what it takes to get from where you are now, to where you want to be. What additional skills and experience do you need? 
• Understand your value proposition – what are you known for, what are your key strengths, what is consistent in your feedback?
• Start speaking out and have the confidence to communicate your accomplishments. Keep track of your successes and keep your Manager updated on the contributions you make to the team & the company. 
• Who or what can help you to reach your goals? Think of inspiring role models and those individuals who are decision-makers and can impact your career. What training or other resources could help you?

Getting into action

• Start leaving your desk! Increase your circle and meet others for coffee/lunch at least once every week. Make it a commitment and a priority.
• Look for opportunities to present to senior management to demonstrate your value.
• Share best practices with others.
• Celebrate team efforts visibly.
• Understand who in the organisation can influence your career and start building relationships with them.
• Seize moments when you can express how your value proposition supports team &/or company initiatives. 
• Prepare for Meetings so that you can speak up to add value and give your ideas/insights.
• If a high-profile project comes up, don’t automatically assume it is not possible. If you being on the team will have a positive impact, talk to the sponsor and at least explore your involvement, whilst respecting your boundaries.
• Be proactive and expand your comfort zone!

Be aware of limiting beliefs that often trip us up:

• “I don’t like promoting myself/showing off” – you can promote yourself with integrity and in line with your values, by attaching any promotion to results and successes. If the success was a team effort, promote the whole team.
• “I’m an introvert” - another common limiting belief is that networking is only for extroverts. Not true. Quality is more important that quantity. Knowing how to ‘work’ a room is helpful but if in doing so, you feel uncomfortable and therefore don’t present your ‘best self’, don’t do it. One-on-one conversations are equally powerful and a great way to build strong relationships. 
• “I don’t like saying no, so I have too much work to network” - be clear on what is important for you at this moment in time and put boundaries in place to maintain those priorities, whilst staying curious and in touch with the wider picture. Being able to say “no” to those activities that do not align with your goals but would add to your volume of work/pressure, is key to staying focused and not becoming over-whelmed.
• “I am too shy” - if you feel shy, look at other resources and ideas which may help you to build your muscle here. Attend networking events outside the organisation – there is an abundance of groups. Also consider groups/training where you improve your skills and confidence at speaking out. If you live in Suisse Romande, email us for a list of such groups:  [email protected].

At Thriving Parents, we passionately believe that parents can have both – a fulfilling role as a parent and a fulfilling career. It has its challenges but if you have professional aspirations, you want to continue to grow, to make your mark; you shouldn’t need to sacrifice it because you have become a parent.